1:Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Closed if possible. There's a lot of junk in my closet so it isn't always possible.

2:Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
Is that not why they're there?

3:Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
Out. I can't sleep unless my feet are sticking out from under the blankets or I get too hot.

4:Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
No but I know many people who have.

5:Do you like to use post-it notes?
Yes. Fun fact, I've only ever paid for 1 pack of sticky notes. They mysteriously appear in my house from parts unknown. Maybe that's the dimension where our missing silverware goes, and we get sticky notes in exchange.

6:Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
All the time.

7:Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
Bear. I'm pretty sensitive to bee stings.

8:Do you have freckles?
No :(

9:Do you always smile for pictures?
It depends on the context of the photo.

10:What is your biggest pet peeve?
Not being taken seriously when I am being serious

11:Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
No.

12:Have you ever peed in the woods?
Heavens no.

13:What about pooped in the woods?
Gracious! What kind of uncultured savage do you take me for

14:Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
I don't usually dance when there IS music playing. Except in my mind, but that's different.

15:Do you chew your pens and pencils?
Yes, constantly

16:How many people have you slept with this week?
Do stuffed animals count as people

17:What size is your bed?
Big enough for me + three cats, or four cats and me sleeping on the couch. 

18:What is your song of the week?

19:Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Yeah. "Pink" encompasses a lot of variations though. Gotta be careful.

20:Do you still watch cartoons?
Only every day

21:Whats your least favorite movie?
Bridesmaids. Everyone loved it but I thought it was painful and formulaic.

22:Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
If I had treasure I wouldn't be burying it. I would be buying a sweet new Tyler Hansbrough warmup and a Kindle DX.

23:What do you drink with dinner?
Milk. Iced tea in the summer.

24:What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Honey mustard yummm

25:What is your favorite food?
There are so many! Pulled pork, cheese fries, Italian wedding soup. The sausage and sour cream omelet at Ye Olde Waffle Shop in Chapel Hill is pretty high on the list. I don't know how they do it, but it's fucking magical.

26:What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Back to the Future, Tron, The Producers

27:Last person you kissed/kissed you?
My cat.

What? My cat is a person. A very fat, furry person who drools a lot.

28:Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
Only if eating an entire sleeve of thin mints in a sitting makes me a girl scout

29:Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
Probably not... there would have to be an astronomical amount of money involved.

30:When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
I guess that letter I wrote to Scott over Christmas break... that would have been what... 4 years ago. Shit.

31:Can you change the oil on a car?
I have the basic idea though I've never done it myself. If you gave me a repair manual and like 3 hours I could probably do it. And knowing me I'd forget to replace a cap or something stupid and ruin my engine.

32:Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Nope never

33:Ever ran out of gas?
Only with the lawn mower

34:Favorite kind of sandwich?
Grilled cheese

35:Best thing to eat for breakfast?
If I'm cooking it myself, pancakes, bacon and hash browns

36:What is your usual bedtime?
~4am

37:Are you lazy?
Of course! That's part of being American.

38:When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
I actually don't remember too much about my costumes as a kid. In college I was Old Gregg. That was pretty awesome.

39:What is your Chinese astrological sign?
Dragon

40:How many languages can you speak?
English, a handful of German, and the language of subtlety

41:Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Yes to Fantasy & Science Fiction and I hope to add Scientific American and Sporting News before the year is over

42:Which are better Lego or Lincoln Logs?
Obviously Lego

43:Are you stubborn?
Yep. I get it from both sides. Everyone in my family is stubborn. In fact my grandfather's nickname was Mulix which is Polish for mule. It's in my blood.

44:Who is better...Leno or Letterman?
Colbert

45:Ever watch soap operas?
English no. Korean yes!

46:Are you afraid of heights?
Nope.

47:Do you sing in the car?
Not generally.

48:Do you sing in the shower?
Never.

49:Do you dance in the car?
Nope I'm pretty sure they made that illegal when they outlawed texting.

50:Ever used a gun?
Nope.

51:Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
I guess high school.

52:Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Not as a general rule.

53:Is Christmas stressful?
No Christmas is fun! I love buying people stuff.

54:Ever eat a pierogi?
Yeah but they're not my favorite.

55:Favorite type of fruit pie?
Key lime

56:Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Astronaut, forensic scientist, theoretical physicist

57:Do you believe in ghosts?
I'm not really sure. I know they probably don't exist but there are still some things that have happened in my house that I can't explain.

58:Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?
Frequently. Must be a glitch in the matrix

59:Take a vitamin daily?
When I remember... which isn't always daily

60:Wear slippers?
Nah.

61:Wear a bath robe?
Yes. I <3 my bathrobe

62:What do you wear to bed?
Whatever I was wearing that day. Until I get my Hansbrough warmup, then I can sleep in that

63:First concert?
Dropkick Murphys

64:Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?
Kmart. Since no one shops there, you can sometimes find things that are sold out other places.

65:Nike or Adidas?
Nike. I would get a Nike tattoo if it would get me a discount. Seriously.

66:Cheetos Or Fritos?
Cheetos. Specifically stale cheetos. I love em stale.

67:Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
Pistachios

68:Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?
non

69:Ever take dance lessons?
As a kid. Ballet is not in high demand on the dance floor so it does me no good.

70:Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
Trophy house husband

71:Can you curl your tongue?
Yes

72:Ever won a spelling bee?
Yeah in 6th grade and then I choked at Counties. It was so stressful I purposely DQed myself from future spelling bees because I didn't want to go through that again.

73:Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
I don't think so.

74:Own any record albums?
In digital format.

75:Own a record player?
Nope.

76:Regularly burn incense?
When I can find it.

77:Ever been in love?
Many times

78:Who would you like to see in concert?
Daft Punk, Reptar again, Passion Pit again, Mord Fustang

79:What was the last concert you saw?
Art Brut in Brooklyn last year

80:Hot tea or cold tea?
Cold

81:Tea or coffee?
Tea

82:Sugar cookies or snickerdoodles?
Snickerdoodles! Sugar cookies are so boring

83:Can you swim well?
Yep

84:Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?
Sure

85:Are you patient?
In most situations

86:DJ or band at a wedding?
I guess it would depend on the band. DJs have a tendency to play garbage... I think I would end up DJing my own wedding reception and letting everyone else dance

87:Ever won a contest?
Several. None of them meaningful

88:Ever have plastic surgery?
Nope too expensive

89:Which are better black or green olives?
Black

90:Can you knit or crochet?
Both. Much better at knitting though. I know how crochet is SUPPOSED to work but I always screw it up.

91:Best room for a fireplace?
Living room

92:Do you want to get married?
You almost have to, for tax purposes if nothing else

93:If married, how long have you been married?
...

94:Who was your high school crush?
His name was Alex and he had red hair and a crooked smile... I think somewhere along the line he became a hardcore Christian though so I may have dodged a bullet there. Funny, I thought gingers had no souls?

95:Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?
Nah, that'd never work.

96:Do you have kids?
Hell no, I'm still a kid myself. Mentally anyway.

97:Do you want kids?
Never

98:Whats your favorite color?
Carolina blue

99:Do you miss anyone right now?
Many people

100: How tall are you?
Five-five-ish

On David West missing a free throw: "IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE BALD! IT'S NOT A GOOD LOOK!!!" 

Upon the entrance of any number of Pacers bench players: "WHO??? WHERE'S REGGIE MILLER? IS THAT REGGIE MILLER?!"

On Tyler Hansbrough diving for a loose ball: "ARREST THAT MAN, HE A HUSTLA!"

While Andre Iguodala was sitting on the bench: "WHY ISN'T HE PLAYING? I PAID GOOD MONEY TO SEE IGUODALA! I AM THE PRESIDENT OF THE IGUODALA FAN CLUB!"

Whenever a friend of his got up to go get a snack or what have you: "Don't get lost! Hold hands now! Use the buddy system!" 

On the guy selling popcorn: "EVERYBODY BOO THAT MAN, HE'S WEARING A YELLOW SHIRT, HE A CLOSET PACER! BOOOOOOO!!!!" (and they all booed him)

On Elton Brand: "HE OLD! HIS AGE IS THE SAME AS HIS JERSEY NUMBER! WHY ARE WE PAYING HIM $60 MILLION??"

On the folks who participated in a halftime half-court shot contest (and missed) (badly)- "THAT'S THE NETS STARTING FIVE RIGHT THERE"

On the folks who participated in a similar three point contest (and missed) (badly)- "SIGN THOSE PEOPLE TO THE BOBCATS"

Near the end of the game, with 3 Sixer points to go until the 100 point score necessary for free Big Mac coupons: "WE DON'T CARE ABOUT THE WIN, WE JUST WANT BIG MACS!" (they didn't get any big macs)

Also near the end, he had a great elaborate call and response chant with all his friends that culminated in "WHEN I SAY HILLSHIRE YOU SAY FARMS, HILLSHIRE! (FARMS!) GO MEAT!!" Pretty sure the whole section lost it after that, if they hadn't already. 

Wherever you are, kid from 205A, they should be paying YOU to come to games. That shit was hilarious. I'm sorry you didn't get your big macs. brofist

Shmowzow!

Mathematical!

Algebraic!

Eartha Kitten is in heat. She's been prancing all over the house for two days cooing and doing her little dance. There are at least five male cats that come around at all hours of the day and night howling outside the windows because they know she's in here (she was with two of them the other day before we could get her inside, the little slut). We have finally solved the mystery of the milkshake what brings all the boys to the yard. It's this.

Whoever wins the tournament, it ain't gonna be Dook! My bracket is trashed thanks to FUCKING MIZZOU but who cares, DOOK LOST

WE LOVE YOU LEHIGH!!!